My Job is hurting my Heart
I tell myself stop it! stop being so selfish stop complaining, its a blessing to have a job that pays well! Well I am thankful for this job for having money to help my family to live to travel. But all in all I HATE MY JOB AND ITS HURTING MY HEART!
So many would say, “well, leave if it is that bad”! Well, if i leave that means leaving Qatar, leaving my friends, leaving my boyfriend, leaving a life I have outside of my job. It makes me sad thinking about leaving everyone.
But my heart is starting to take over. My mind has put up a battle trying to be LOGIC about all of this.
Mind: be financially secured, make sure you know where you want to go after you leave Qatar, you have a big promotion that is approaching are you sure you want to turn that opportunity down? Marie don’t make any mistakes. You know you do not want to return back home to St. Petersburg all that is there are people that are guaranteed to work your nerves and too much sadness.
Now my heart is jumping in
Heart: mind you have put up this fight too long and i have given you your way for the past two years, now its my turn to have some fun!!! Don’t worry dear, everything is going to be alright. Hasn’t the Lord always taken care of you in all situations?
“Yes”! is my reply
Heart: So why is that you are afraid its time for a change its time for some adventure its time to put your lessons into actions!
Lord help me choose give me the strength to step out on faith!
May 8, 2008 at 4:11 pm
It is conditioning that your mind speaks of. Your heart guides you and your faith protects you.
It is about being true to yourself not as you are conditioned to think of yourself but as a HUMAN who is simply being.
As you go with the flow…of energy, a process is recognized and begins to evolve. Recognizing it simply for what it is, remaining open to it and realizing that you can control that flow, you can sing “I can see clearly now the rain has gone.”. Solutions are presented as clear as day.
The process is life, a human being, the energy that supports us is positive and powerful. In whatever form we allow it to take.
As I personally realize this process as it unfolds through me and before me, I remain in awe at my constant revelation.
To survive all I need is provided to me. The hustle and bustle in my mind can slow me down and send me every which way but loose/ free. When I recognize the urge from my heart that feels positive, I shall go with the flow and take action consistent with that urge.
Faith protects me, love moves me, god as presented through my heart guides me. I am grateful that it is so.
Doug